The protective armor that keeps us from living

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The protective armor that keeps us from living

How many people do you know that are really comfortable in their own skin?  Can you risk the vulnerability of letting the world, or even yourself, really see you and not just the protected public self we allow to be seen?  What do we fear most – rejection by others or even self-rejection?  We spend quite a bit of our time creating that acceptable outer self to avoid what we fear most - that we may not be worthy of being loved and accepted for who we are at our authentic core.  So why is that the case for so many of us?

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Subsidiarity (Do John Halpin and John Podesta even know what it means?)

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Subsidiarity (Do John Halpin and John Podesta even know what it means?)

You can learn some interesting things about how people really think when Wikileaks dumps their emails on the public.  I am not a proponent of this type of invasion of personal privacy, but since the media has abdicated its critical journalistic responsibilities to keep the public informed and protected, I can make an exception here when the individuals are actively working to undermine religious beliefs.  If you have not had a chance to read the emails, they were centered around mocking the “severely backward,” “ignorant,” and “medieval” thinking of conservative Catholics by the president of the Center for American Progress.  One note John Halpin wrote to Clinton campaign manager John Podesta, “They can throw around ‘Thomistic’ thought and ‘subsidiarity’ and sound sophisticated because no one knows what the hell they're talking about.”  My question is if they even understand what the term means?  Since they brought it up, it is an important concept in Catholic social teaching that is worth thinking about. 

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Fun and laughter for your relationships

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Fun and laughter for your relationships

Even science tells us that laughter and playfulness creates social bonds, increases well-being, reduces pain and anxiety, and can be a positive to those around us.  Laughter can make people feel safer, more relaxed and more connected to those we interact with. Laughter and humor increases our capacity to learn, to be creative, to cope and deal with the difficulties of life and to create stronger social bonds. There are research studies that show that when children laugh, it enhances their attention, perception, motivation, memory,  and learning.   A sense of humor, laugher and play can help to also reduce depression and stress and increase our actual pain tolerance by as much as 50%. Taking time to play and laugh is a way of expressing inner joy. 

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Joy and Happiness

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Joy and Happiness

Growing up, my family never went on a vacation. My father kept my brothers and I busy during the summers building walls or patios, painting houses and doing landscaping, butI can still remember loving the rhythm of the summer, the longer days, warm evenings and being outside.  When I got married, I was introduced to going somewhere (Maine) for a summer vacation.  My wife and my daughters loved spending two weeks in the small, unassuming fishing village of Stonington with and incredible beauty of the rugged coastline.  I still can remember our two girls racing down the pier at the harbor and the word that comes to mind is joy.  Joy for them seemed natural.  Being in the moment, in a beautiful place, with the people I loved most, and taking the time to appreciate all the blessings I had gave me a deep sense of peace and of joy as well.

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Can't Buy Me Love

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Can't Buy Me Love

When I was a young kid growing up in Lynn, Massachusetts, I probably didn't realize it but it was one of the poorer cities in the state.  I was eight years old and I can remember walking over to the record store on Market Street to buy my first record, Can't Buy Me Love.  As much of a Beatles fan as I was, who would have thought that they would have gotten me thinking about my priorities in life?  (Of course, my older brother gave me a hard time a few years later for getting Johnny Cash’s A Boy Names Sue over the Rolling Stone’s Honky Tonk Woman – so I can’t say I my musical taste was overly discerning. )  I probably bought Can’t Buy Me Love because I thought the song was fun but there was something about the lyrics of the song that did hit home though, even in those early years.

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An Offer You Can Refuse

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An Offer You Can Refuse

The Godfather could be my favorite movie of all time.  Everyone is probably familiar with the famous line from Don Corleone (Marlon Brando) when explains to his Godson, Johnny Fontaine, how he is going to get a powerful studio head, Woltz, to give Johnny the part in a movie that he does not want to give him.  “I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse.”   Corleone made the choice for Woltz an unpleasant one but an easy one - “do what I say or you die.”  With God, we also get an offer, but the difference is that it is an offer we can refuse because he loves us enough to give us the gift and responsibility of “free will.”

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September 13, 1986

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September 13, 1986

I met a beautiful, fun, intelligent and friendly girl named Joanne in the fall of 1985.  On our first evening date, we enjoyed a fun dinner and a movie.  It was such a nice evening when I brought her home that we went for stroll and ended up on a small bride over the Charles River and watched the stars overhead.  Back in front of her apartment we had our first kiss and I will never forget that look in Joanne’s eyes.  It was a look that has stayed with me and made me smile until this very day. 

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The Mouth of Truth

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The Mouth of Truth

If you have never seen the movie, Roman Holiday, with Gregory Peck and Audrey Hepburn, it is worth checking out.  Gregory Peck plays a paparazzi type American reporter in Rome who happens upon a young princess, Audrey Hepburn, who wants to be free from her real identify to experience a day in Rome.  One of my favorite scenes takes place at the Boca Della Veritae (Mouth of Truth), an ancient stone near the entrance of an old church.  Peck explains the legend to Hepburn, telling her that if a liar puts his hand inside the mouth, it would be bitten off while a truthful person would have nothing to fear.  Who wouldn’t be tentative to put their own hand in that mouth?

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